What Your Friends Are Saying About Life After College

There seems to be a class missing from college curriculum that everyone feels, but no one talks about. In fact, I’ve never heard of a lecture that covered the all-too-practical topics of choosing an insurance plans or how to consolidate finances once you’re married. And let’s not even mention the whole “having kids” thing!

Somewhere in the midst of throwing your graduation cap in the air and sitting in a cubicle on a Tuesday morning, a lot changed. And many of us don’t know what to do about it.

I’ve had my own musings about this post-college season, many of which I wrote in What They Don’t Tell You About Life After College. But I finally had the chance to hear from YOU about this unique transition. Here are a few answers that stuck out to me.

What have you found most difficult about post-grad life?

“It’s hard! All your friends move away or to different areas. It feels like you lose a lot of friends.”

“Motivating myself to stay off the couch after a long day at work.”

“Losing the community of friends I had built over the last 4 years. Plus getting married and having a hard time finding friends in the same place of life.”

“Either not living within 5 minutes of all your best friends (missing the community of college life), or having to make adult decisions on your own, like apartments and health insurance.”

“Dealing with friendship breakups.”

“Such a different life than I imagined I’d have. Contentment and understanding is sporadic.”

“Feeling like I have to be done learning. Loss of an identity I created as a student.”

Here’s what these tell me about post-grad life:

  1. Friendships are important, and after college, you will have to fight for them. No longer can you knock on the door of the dorm next to you and hang out with your closest friends. You must seek out friendships and community even when it seems awkward or forced because we need community to grow as believers.
  2. Contentment and motivation don’t come easy. Did they ever really, though? Satan’s #1 tactic throughout your life is to make you want the “better,” “newer,” “more prestigious,” or “more popular” thing…even if that means neglecting the MOST important things. Don’t let the desire for more or the desire to be lazy and comfortable to supersede your desire to honor God through your actions.
  3. There will be a learning curve. Whether it’s loss of identity after leaving school or fear of not knowing enough about “real” adulting, every year of your life will involve learning. Some of this learning will be about insurance or parenting or how to fix your sink, but other things will be about emotional awareness or spiritual intimacy. We must never grow weary of learning these things, even when they don’t come naturally. But most importantly, we must never grow weary of learning about our Savior and asking how we can share what we’ve learned with a broken world.

Hopefully you will feel encouraged by your peers’ words that you are NOT alone. Every transitional season of life is challenging, but provides a new way to rely upon the Lord and His strength. I don’t have the “magic” formula to fix post-grad woes. But I do know the God who has a purpose for you in the midst of them.

If you have any feedback or comments you want to add to the discussion, please respond to this post or email me at thepursuitofyourfirstlove@gmail.com.


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